Comes back with two whiskey bottles and two new glasses with ice. ]
This way I don't have to go back out there again. [ And it means he can get comfortable. Layouts are a lie, but he's gonna pick the wall nearest to Bertolt and sit down against it. Nagako settles nearby, keeping an ear towards the door. ]
Kanpai. [ Bottoms up. This is probably going to hit him shortly, but the advantages(disadvantages?) of having food in his stomach and not being a stranger to liquor at home.
A breath out as he feels the whiskey move down his chest. ]
I guess the nice part of this is you can't tell me what a good job I did not dying permanently. [ People mean well, but a tsun will be a tsun. ]
[ Raises his glass and drains it as well. He only makes a face once it's empty. He is a stranger to alcohol, but has some food in his stomach so it'll take a bit before he starts to feel the effects.
Instead he leans his head back as far as he can before his antlers stop him, but he angles his head so he can look at Akira as he speaks.
He makes a face at that, but doesn't do anything more. This is Akira's story so he'll listen (not like he can do anything more than that). ]
That face better be cause of the whiskey. [ Even if he knows it's not.
He shifts a bit ensuring he's fully comfortable, then starts to speak. ]
It's a short story and a long one. But either way, I fucked up. I wound up in another place with Rin, Alisaie, and that old geezer Van Zieks. Eventually we wound up on this mountain which was, of course, fucking haunted. Met a ghost there that could use blue fire, which Alisaie was Baraqiel? I dunno, I've talked to the guy like, once.
[ A sip of his drink. ]
It started out pretty fun, I got to fight with an Ogre for starters.
[ Makes another face, a bit of a smirk, before he takes another sip of his whiskey. He crosses his legs to make himself comfortable as he listens to Akira's story, nodding once.
[ Does he need to shake down a certain crane. A tilt of his head later, Akira continues. ]
I don't know how long I fought with the Ogre, but eventually I needed to find a weapon cause there were too many undead. Rin managed to disarm one of them, literally, so that got me a sword. I'm not trained, but Yoo Joonghyuk taught me the basics.
...it was actually one hell of a good time until the voices started. The mountain we were on was a bloodthirsty one, and it put the words of people we knew in our heads. For Rin that was his brother, for me that was Kakuya. I don't remember if I told you about her, but she's the spirit who dragged me into this whole thing by kidnapping my sister.
Hearing her voice on repeat really, really, fucking pissed me off. [ He says this through gritted teeth, the hand not currently holding a glass balled up into a fist. ]
But he's patient as he listens. He doesn't react much to the story of the fight. He trusts Akira to take care of himself and being able to hold his own, or well, as best he can. He lets out a small huff of breath that could be understood as laughter once Akira talks about it as being a good time.
But then that changes when Akira talks about voice. He notices Akira's hand clench. The sad thing about being dead is not having Idi anymore. He takes another drink from his glass before shifting, tapping one of his legs against Akira in a small show of comfort. ]
[ He blinks at the tap, not entirely sure what to make of it but that's not necessarily a bad thing. In the silence he takes another gulp of whiskey, almost done with this glass. ]
After that I just lost it. I don't know whether it was the mountain or my bloodmetry—you probably heard, right? I can read the memories of blood, it's something I've been doing every week. It's fucking crazy, but it has its uses.
[ A shake of his head. ]
All I could see was the flashes of memories, but I should've known better, I was drenched in blood at that point. When I could think again, I was in a pile of corpses and it felt like I had been hit by a truck. Like something had hit me back into my body as hard as it could.
[ He nods at the bloodmetry. He's heard of it, but can't and won't explain how he knows. His face takes on a worried look as he keeps explaining what happened to him. He doesn't do much else, except have drinks of his whiskey, but he does give his full attention to Akira. ]
Pretty sure I lost an organ or two, but they're all there now. [ Maybe this heaviness calls for a break in the story or maybe he just wants something to do with his hands. Akira finishes what's left in his glass, sets it down beside him and then starts to unbutton his shirt with little fanfare until his entire chest and midriff is exposed.
Bertolt gets a nice look at his absolutely shredded abs, with no injuries to speak of. ]
See? [ A slight smirk. ] The wounds are actually on my back, but if I take this entire thing off I'm not putting it back on again. And they're mostly healed anyway.
[ He's about to tilt his head when Akira sets down his drink but then he sees him start to unbutton his shirt and all he can do is just sit there and stare. Is this a good time for him to finish his drink? Yeah, probably. He brings his glass to his lips and drains it as that shirt is undone and he all he can do is just look at Akira's absolutely shredded abs.
He realizes what he's doing and moves his eyes back up to Akira's face, hoping that the mask is doing a good job of hiding his flush, or that it can be blamed on the alcohol. But he nods at him. ]
[ If Akira wasn't himself he would probably make several realizations here, but he does not. However, that's probably what led him to just exposing his chest in the first place so.
He does notice the flush, but he isn't a stranger to what alcohol does to people, and he's honestly used to being stared at too. But maybe there's an inkling back there somewhere, that he should be picking up on something else. ]
You want more? [ He refills his own glass and holds up the bottle and honestly will probably keep his shirt like this for as long as they're here talking cause he really doesn't like form fitting clothes and sees no downside to this. ]
[ Bertolt just sort of dumbly nods his head in agreement at that question. What is he agreeing to? More drinks or more skin? Either way, the answer is yes for him. He sees the bottle and just very quickly holds up his glass for it to be filled.
He bites his lip again, shaking his head trying to clear his thoughts a bit. It's fine. ]
[ Does he even want to be saved here? No, leave him--
But he stops and nods his head, taking another drink. How many drinks is this? His third? He should probably stop soon but he has the feeling he'll need this. For as tense as he usually is, he looks more relaxed, a combination of being around Akira and the alcohol. He stretches out his legs and leans back against the wall again, letting out a small sigh of relief. ]
[ He doesn't do anything for a moment. The stretch is enough to distract him momentarily, his eyes going back down to Akira's chest. But then he hears the question. He wouldn't think to do this before, but maybe it's being back here with Akira or the liquid courage or a little bit of both.
Bertolt shifts his glass so that it's in one hand and then with his free hand, he reaches over and very slowly takes one of Akira's hands in his. And then he looks at Akira's face as if to ask "Is this alright?" ]
[ I am totally saying the hand Bertolt took is his ungloved one because why not.
It takes Akira a few seconds to process what is happening for several reasons, not the least of which is his increasing state of inebriation, but it's also not the most important one either. He'd feel lost in this moment even if he was stone cold sober.
Some gear clacks in his mind that this is the same situation as when Rosé would wink at him and say that he's her favorite, or when she would invite herself over to his room in the dead of night, greeting him with a mischievous smile and light laughter. His reaction was always the same no matter how much she upped the ante; steadfastly ignoring the topic and kicking her out if need be. This is the same, but different.
But right now, neither of those seem to be an option. He doesn't feel a desire to pull back for one, and now that he's noticed it seems impossible to ignore (he's not even sure if he would want to, but his thoughts never get that far). There's that conversation he had with Rameel which is probably a big reason, but also with Yoo Joonghyuk that make him pause. Pausing is however, a step up from not seeing or refusing to see.
His eyes are a bit wide as he glances from their hands to Bertolt's face, a slight flush apparent, whether that be from the whiskey or the situation impossible to discern. His hand stays there as he finds his voice, because this isn't a situation where he can lapse into silence either. ]
But that pause from Akira is probably one of the longest moments Bertolt has felt in some time. He's never stepped up and done anything like this before (in his mind, Reiner's voice echoes for him to tell Annie but this feels more certain, more real). He's nervous enough that he's not even sweating, so-- no clammy hand touching at least?
But then Akira speaks and doesn't move his hand away and Bertolt feels part of the tension ease out of him. Ok, this is not bad--
He gives Akira a shy smile and shakes his head. As drunk as they are, they probably shouldn't start dancing anytime soon. Especially not with Akira's shirt still undone.
That would certainly lead to more rumors.
Instead he scoots the tiniest bit closer and gives Akira's hand a small squeeze. He wants it clear what he's trying to say to him, what he's trying to tell him. ]
[ Akira has honestly forgotten that he has his shirt undone at this point, but rumors would be bad cause they'd piss him off. People should stay in their own lane is largely how he views life, with certain exceptions, and of course that if something is happening in front of him he's entitled to make it his business. Contradictory and not, but he's never fit into the neat little boxes of Japanese society either.
With his hand squeezed it's more apparent if it wasn't already, and Nagako picks her head up from the floor to look over. Her eyes are bright but not hostile, and she's clearly aware that something is going on over there. ]
I, uh— [ He doesn't squeeze back, but after a beat his fingers brush lightly against Bertolt's, maybe in a small show of exploration. ]
...did you get my last letter? I sent it Sunday.
[ There is a reason for this but words are very hard right now. ]
[ Fitting into society is for other people, says the child soldier who joined a military program for his dad to get medicine and became a national hero.
If only Idi were still here for Nagako to loop around her snout for nuzzles. But, no more daemons for the ghosts.
Another smile and he seems to relax a bit more when he feels Akira's fingers brush against his. Alright, this is... good. This is very good.
...OK. [ He shakes his head, tussles his hair with his free hand (the taken hand is staying like that for now) and takes a breath. ]
Lemme finish that story then. So after I woke up when I died—I didn't know what the hell was going on. But I woke up in a pile of corpses that had been impaled clean through which didn't make any sense. Rin and I both were using swords, and swords don't stab like that, not for long anyway.
The whole crap with Rin this weekend finally made me realize. I had an idea before then but—I don't know what you can see, but Rin is half a demon or whatever, and it was that half that came out and killed Tsuru.
...one of my partners back home said something weird to me, once. I don't wanna get into it, but she basically said we're the same, that we're both monsters. I had no idea what the hell she was going on about at the time, she's always been out there, but most people in the occult are.
I don't remember what happened on that mountain but I can still feel it. My bloodmetry went out of control, looping and looping and looping and I turned into something and then I died.
[ Oh, this hits so much closer to home than Bertolt would like. If anybody would know what it is like to turn into a monster, it would be Bertolt.
Except he has full control when he does.
He shifts slightly, turning to Akira to give him all his attention as he listens to the rest of the story play out. Bertolt does nothing else but watch Akira and listen to this. He squeezes Akira's hand once more when he states that he turned into something and died.
He wants to talk to him, he wants to speak out about what this means, but he can't. Instead, what he does is set down his glass, still unfinished, and shift a little more. With that hand now free, he reaches over and places it on Akira's shoulder, wanting to be comforting.
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he's just going to look at him then.
yeah he's gonna chug back the rest of his drink here and motions at his empty glass and then at him.
grab him one too ]
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Comes back with two whiskey bottles and two new glasses with ice. ]
This way I don't have to go back out there again. [ And it means he can get comfortable. Layouts are a lie, but he's gonna pick the wall nearest to Bertolt and sit down against it. Nagako settles nearby, keeping an ear towards the door. ]
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Cheers? ]
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Kanpai. [ Bottoms up. This is probably going to hit him shortly, but the advantages(disadvantages?) of having food in his stomach and not being a stranger to liquor at home.
A breath out as he feels the whiskey move down his chest. ]
I guess the nice part of this is you can't tell me what a good job I did not dying permanently. [ People mean well, but a tsun will be a tsun. ]
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Instead he leans his head back as far as he can before his antlers stop him, but he angles his head so he can look at Akira as he speaks.
He makes a face at that, but doesn't do anything more. This is Akira's story so he'll listen (not like he can do anything more than that). ]
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That face better be cause of the whiskey. [ Even if he knows it's not.
He shifts a bit ensuring he's fully comfortable, then starts to speak. ]
It's a short story and a long one. But either way, I fucked up. I wound up in another place with Rin, Alisaie, and that old geezer Van Zieks. Eventually we wound up on this mountain which was, of course, fucking haunted. Met a ghost there that could use blue fire, which Alisaie was Baraqiel? I dunno, I've talked to the guy like, once.
[ A sip of his drink. ]
It started out pretty fun, I got to fight with an Ogre for starters.
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It seems like he knows that something happened. ]
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I don't know how long I fought with the Ogre, but eventually I needed to find a weapon cause there were too many undead. Rin managed to disarm one of them, literally, so that got me a sword. I'm not trained, but Yoo Joonghyuk taught me the basics.
...it was actually one hell of a good time until the voices started. The mountain we were on was a bloodthirsty one, and it put the words of people we knew in our heads. For Rin that was his brother, for me that was Kakuya. I don't remember if I told you about her, but she's the spirit who dragged me into this whole thing by kidnapping my sister.
Hearing her voice on repeat really, really, fucking pissed me off. [ He says this through gritted teeth, the hand not currently holding a glass balled up into a fist. ]
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But he's patient as he listens. He doesn't react much to the story of the fight. He trusts Akira to take care of himself and being able to hold his own, or well, as best he can. He lets out a small huff of breath that could be understood as laughter once Akira talks about it as being a good time.
But then that changes when Akira talks about voice. He notices Akira's hand clench. The sad thing about being dead is not having Idi anymore. He takes another drink from his glass before shifting, tapping one of his legs against Akira in a small show of comfort. ]
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After that I just lost it. I don't know whether it was the mountain or my bloodmetry—you probably heard, right? I can read the memories of blood, it's something I've been doing every week. It's fucking crazy, but it has its uses.
[ A shake of his head. ]
All I could see was the flashes of memories, but I should've known better, I was drenched in blood at that point. When I could think again, I was in a pile of corpses and it felt like I had been hit by a truck. Like something had hit me back into my body as hard as it could.
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Bertolt gets a nice look at his absolutely shredded abs, with no injuries to speak of. ]
See? [ A slight smirk. ] The wounds are actually on my back, but if I take this entire thing off I'm not putting it back on again. And they're mostly healed anyway.
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He realizes what he's doing and moves his eyes back up to Akira's face, hoping that the mask is doing a good job of hiding his flush, or that it can be blamed on the alcohol. But he nods at him. ]
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He does notice the flush, but he isn't a stranger to what alcohol does to people, and he's honestly used to being stared at too. But maybe there's an inkling back there somewhere, that he should be picking up on something else. ]
You want more? [ He refills his own glass and holds up the bottle and honestly will probably keep his shirt like this for as long as they're here talking cause he really doesn't like form fitting clothes and sees no downside to this. ]
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He bites his lip again, shaking his head trying to clear his thoughts a bit. It's fine. ]
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Akira obliges, and dips back into his drink. ]
There's more to it, but we can take a break for a bit. This is much better than the last time I drank this much to answer stupid questions.
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But he stops and nods his head, taking another drink. How many drinks is this? His third? He should probably stop soon but he has the feeling he'll need this. For as tense as he usually is, he looks more relaxed, a combination of being around Akira and the alcohol. He stretches out his legs and leans back against the wall again, letting out a small sigh of relief. ]
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So I guess, is there anything you wanna ask me? Can't be stupider than Rameel.
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Bertolt shifts his glass so that it's in one hand and then with his free hand, he reaches over and very slowly takes one of Akira's hands in his. And then he looks at Akira's face as if to ask "Is this alright?" ]
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It takes Akira a few seconds to process what is happening for several reasons, not the least of which is his increasing state of inebriation, but it's also not the most important one either. He'd feel lost in this moment even if he was stone cold sober.
Some gear clacks in his mind that this is the same situation as when Rosé would wink at him and say that he's her favorite, or when she would invite herself over to his room in the dead of night, greeting him with a mischievous smile and light laughter. His reaction was always the same no matter how much she upped the ante; steadfastly ignoring the topic and kicking her out if need be. This is the same, but different.
But right now, neither of those seem to be an option. He doesn't feel a desire to pull back for one, and now that he's noticed it seems impossible to ignore (he's not even sure if he would want to, but his thoughts never get that far). There's that conversation he had with Rameel which is probably a big reason, but also with Yoo Joonghyuk that make him pause. Pausing is however, a step up from not seeing or refusing to see.
His eyes are a bit wide as he glances from their hands to Bertolt's face, a slight flush apparent, whether that be from the whiskey or the situation impossible to discern. His hand stays there as he finds his voice, because this isn't a situation where he can lapse into silence either. ]
...you better not be asking me to dance.
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But that pause from Akira is probably one of the longest moments Bertolt has felt in some time. He's never stepped up and done anything like this before (in his mind, Reiner's voice echoes for him to tell Annie but this feels more certain, more real). He's nervous enough that he's not even sweating, so-- no clammy hand touching at least?
But then Akira speaks and doesn't move his hand away and Bertolt feels part of the tension ease out of him. Ok, this is not bad--
He gives Akira a shy smile and shakes his head. As drunk as they are, they probably shouldn't start dancing anytime soon. Especially not with Akira's shirt still undone.
That would certainly lead to more rumors.
Instead he scoots the tiniest bit closer and gives Akira's hand a small squeeze. He wants it clear what he's trying to say to him, what he's trying to tell him. ]
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With his hand squeezed it's more apparent if it wasn't already, and Nagako picks her head up from the floor to look over. Her eyes are bright but not hostile, and she's clearly aware that something is going on over there. ]
I, uh— [ He doesn't squeeze back, but after a beat his fingers brush lightly against Bertolt's, maybe in a small show of exploration. ]
...did you get my last letter? I sent it Sunday.
[ There is a reason for this but words are very hard right now. ]
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If only Idi were still here for Nagako to loop around her snout for nuzzles. But, no more daemons for the ghosts.
Another smile and he seems to relax a bit more when he feels Akira's fingers brush against his. Alright, this is... good. This is very good.
But he shakes his head at that. ]
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Lemme finish that story then. So after I woke up when I died—I didn't know what the hell was going on. But I woke up in a pile of corpses that had been impaled clean through which didn't make any sense. Rin and I both were using swords, and swords don't stab like that, not for long anyway.
The whole crap with Rin this weekend finally made me realize. I had an idea before then but—I don't know what you can see, but Rin is half a demon or whatever, and it was that half that came out and killed Tsuru.
...one of my partners back home said something weird to me, once. I don't wanna get into it, but she basically said we're the same, that we're both monsters. I had no idea what the hell she was going on about at the time, she's always been out there, but most people in the occult are.
I don't remember what happened on that mountain but I can still feel it. My bloodmetry went out of control, looping and looping and looping and I turned into something and then I died.
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Except he has full control when he does.
He shifts slightly, turning to Akira to give him all his attention as he listens to the rest of the story play out. Bertolt does nothing else but watch Akira and listen to this. He squeezes Akira's hand once more when he states that he turned into something and died.
He wants to talk to him, he wants to speak out about what this means, but he can't. Instead, what he does is set down his glass, still unfinished, and shift a little more. With that hand now free, he reaches over and places it on Akira's shoulder, wanting to be comforting.
Please talk to him more. ]
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